Word Play

And so our worst fears have already materialized. AI has crossed over from being useful to being a useful idiot.

I knew this would happen.

All I did was ask my phone a simple question. “When did Arizona begin calling dust storms haboobs”? I watched its little mind spin as it searched the universe for a specific date. That’s all I wanted. The answer to “when?”

I remember where I was when I first heard that the term “dust storm” wasn’t good enough for our weathermen anymore. I was visiting friends in Idaho the day someone first videotaped an impressive rolling wall of dirt, sand and dust as it swallowed Phoenix whole and then called it a haboob, whatever that was. But what year did that take place?

Either I speak with a lisp or I need to clean my iPhone’s ears out. The answer was curt.

Arizona did not start calling dust storms “her boobs;”
the term used is haboob.

 

Oh, for pity’s sake. Dust storms don’t even resemble boobs. Doesn’t my iPhone even know me? Why would I ever ask a stupid question like that? Instantly offended, I searched my screen for a place to respond. Of course, there wasn’t one. How clever of you, Artificial Intelligence, to protect yourself from correction. You can dish it out but you can’t take it.

I took a screen shot of my scolding and today I asked it the same question. Once again, AI researched what it heard instead of what I said. If this keeps up, I’m going to have to put a parental block on my own phone.

I did get the answer to my question, though. It was 2011 when our local meteorologists first latched onto the term. I remember seeing pictures of the massive storm on my friend’s computer way back then, mouth agape, asking, “What the heck is a haboob?”

Listen, I’ve lived in Arizona’s desert for more than forty-five years of my life. I’ve seen my fair share of summer dust storms. Maybe you’ve never experienced one, but they’re nasty. They trash swimming pools with silty soil and leaves and lawn furniture. They’re dangerous to drive in, especially on freeways, reducing visibility to zero. They cover everything in dirt and are rarely followed up with a good washdown from the very monsoon storms that cause them.

Like I said, nasty. And windy. But that’s all they are. They’re made up entirely of dust and wind and possibly small rodents. Thus the term, “dust storm.” Which, by the way, is the translation of the Arabic word haboob - Dust Storm.

Sigh. I know. I’m making a butte out of a knoll, or a mountain out of a mole hill. (Doesn’t really roll off the tongue the same way, does it?) I’m just saying—if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

Here’s my real beef, besides the insertion of foreign phrases that do nothing to clear the air. The source of haboobs across the Sahara Desert are thunderstorm downdrafts. They occur when a collapsing storm creates a wall of airborne sediment miles long and thousands of feet high.

On the other hand, dust storms in Arizona are caused by thunderstorm downdrafts. They create a powerful outflow, lifting dusty silt and debris from the ground and forming a wall of airborne sediment that can be miles long and several thousand feet high.

Well, that certainly clears it up.

They’re the same thing.

I guess scientists wanted a new word to describe a really dramatic wall of dirt that looks more impressive than our ordinary run of the mill variety. So when in the 1970’s they noticed how our dusty summer monsoons resembled dust storms in Sudan, they imported their word for dust storm and substituted it for our word for dust storm. In 2011 the internet adopted the name permanently.

Genius.

The videos of the haboob we experienced here last week are definitely impressive. But I was home for this one and the only difference I saw between The Great Haboob of 2025 and every other dirt flurry I’ve already experienced in the desert this summer was more wind and the delight of seeing my patio chairs fly across the back porch.

Desert rats like me don’t get that excited by new terms for old storms. And, in my opinion, weathermen who think we do are ha-boobs. 

Mother Nature doesn't care what you call her little temper tantrum. Just remember to lock down your patio furniture and cover the pool before the next one hits.

Can you hear me now, AI? Put that in your hookah and vape it.

With thanks to Jasper Nance for allowing the use of the amazing photo seen above. The original can be viewed from this link: Haboob!! | Moments before impact 4x10mm image panorama | Jasper Nance | Flickr